Here in is my response to a communique i was sent several days ago (see below for original message)

“Dearest BARRS :Edward Abadull

May I call you Ed or Ward perchance?  Your correspondence fills me and my family with a great sadness.  Long since have we wondered what happened to Eng. Thax.  Many was the happy Christmases when he, along with his wife and only daughter would bring all the lads and lassies from the Aspanda Development Union, hence fourth known simply as Aspanda to our family home for joyous celebrations of the birth of our lord and saviour the baby of Jesus Christ of Bethlehem, Nazareth the first.

Aspanda was a champion charades player, which for a man with only one arm and no legs, was an incredible achievement.  Charades was his favourite game, probably due to his horrific speech impediment and facial spasms.  Any game that didn’t involve talking was of interest to Aspanda.  Thinking back, that’s probably why he loathed playing ITV’s Knightmare, his inability to say ‘Side Step to the left’ was the cause of his frequent and violent depressions.

We didn’t just see Aspanda, His only wife and daughter at Christmas, he would come for all the major Christian celebrations, such as Easter, Lent, St Talbots ascension, Titty day, and the crossing of Saint Nippletpinch.  Although he was a devout Buddhist he enjoyed the colours and sounds of pageantry.

I am weeping as I write this, remember old Aspanda, I feel if we are to split his 9.5 million dollars in a 70/30 split (70 to me of course) I think I should tell you a little about him.  He was a deeply ugly man, as I say, having but one arm and no legs.  His face was scared due to his love of head butting light bulbs.  He had only one good eye, which he kept in a jar on his windowsill.  He and his family lived in a small house, on wheels, in a lay by.  It was a caravan.  He often smelled of porridge and staplers. His favourite gland was the adrenal gland and he wouldn’t stay in the same room as a ghost!

Now I come to the tender subject of his money which we only have 14 official days to get to.  I would be very interested to know how he came about acquiring 9.5 million US dollars, given his keenness for betting on snail racers.  He must have won big I assume.  As stated above I wouldn’t be happy with a 50/50 split, he was my Aspanda, and very dear to me was he!  The minimum I would be happy for is now 80/20, 80 to me and my family and 20 to you and your kin.

I have made several promises to friends and well-wishers about donations to them, which range from five sterling coins to four hundred thousand to a chap so he can get his girlfriend (who is an alien) some new space age clothes, they cost a fortune from Nasa but are made from very modern fabrics indeed!

I assume all you need is my bank account details, which are as follows

Bank: Biddyton National conglomerates bank of realness

Account  no: 7 (It is an old bank account, handed down throughout the generations)

Sort code – 15 to 1

My mother’s maiden name is ‘Horrible’

And my inside leg measures 28 inches

The other is nearly 1.5 CM on a good day!

I hope to hear from you soon about Eng. Thax’s money.  My only worry is that my name Paul Thax, is but a stage name, my real name being Paul Thacks.  I can’t assume this would affect my claim on Eng. Thax’s money.

All my love

Paul Thax (Thacks)

PS

I now want a 99/1 split in my favour!

PPS

I don’t think Deal or no deal can run on much longer!”

Dear Friend// Pls urgent information

I am Barrs : Edward Abadull, a solicitor at law. I am the personal attorney to Eng. Thax, a national of your country, who used to workwith Aspanda Development Union. Here in after aspanda be referred to as my client. On the 21st of April 2001, my client, his wife and their only daughter were involved in a car accident along sagbama express road.

All occupants of the vehicle unfortunately lost their lives.Since then I have made several inquiries to your embassy here to locate any of my client extended relatives, this has also proved unsuccessful.

After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to track his last name over the Internet, tolocate any member of his family hence Icontacted you. I have contacted you toassist in repatriating the fund valued at (US$9.5 million) left behind by my client before it gets Confiscated or declared unserviceable by the bank where this huge amount were deposited.

The said bank of development togolaise has issued me a notice to provide the next of kin or havethe account confiscated within the next fourteen official working days.

For the fact that I have been unsuccessfully locating the relatives for over 2 years now, I seek the consent to present you as the next of kin to the deceased, since you have the same last name with my client, so that the proceeds of this account can be paid to you.

Therefore, on receipt ofyour positive response, we shall then share the percentage as 50% for me ,50%for you.I have all necessary information and legal documents needed to back you up for claim.

All I require from you is your honest cooperation to enable ussee this transaction through.

I guarantee you that this will be executed under legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of the law.

Please get back to me through my office email address (edwardabadull()yahoo.com)

Best regards,

BARRS :Edward Abadull (Esq)”